Yes – My intent is to trash talk this horrible company and badly as possible. I have no reason to be nice here. They need some straight-talk and to be put in line. If you’re reading this from CenturyLink – don’t take it personally, don’t even think I dislike YOU. Take it corporately. I’m sure there’s some good people at this company, but the vast majority are idiots, and if you’re at CenturyLink right now, you probably know in your heart it’s true. You’ve probably wondered how you ended up working with such morons. Sorry to refer to your colleagues in such a degrading way, but somebody has got to speak out. THIS IS UMPITYGRUMPITY AFTERALL. And I’m about to speak my mind.

First of all – really? I spoke with the supposed regional manager for eastern Washington’s CenturyLink network during my time of CenturyLink DSL frustration, and you know what he told me after not fixing the problem, but making the techs “look into it” more? He basically gave me a guilt-trip for speaking my mind on my blog and used the word “harsh” in referring to my words about CenturyLink. Well duh – they’re harsh, because that’s the perception I’ve had of their customer service. When a product doesn’t work right, and it doesn’t get fixed..and then it’s given up on, that’s harsh!

Now that it’s 2011 we know that 1.5 mbit/sec in some parts of the Methow Valley is STILL all that they offer (when just down the street they have FIBER OPTIC!), and my friends pay more for that than my parents were paying for 10mbit/sec. Heck more than I pay for 20mbit/sec! We know that their service is already ridiculously overpriced, but to top that off, guess what? Yep. Their service severely sucks. We tried working together with CenturyLink’s customer service guys who were on task with my situation to resolve the same issues with some friends of mine. You know what happened? Nothing. No, not even a call. No visit. Nothing. Every time these friends would try to call tech support, they would get told the same thing: Reset your modem to defaults, reboot your machine, everything is working on “our” end. Seriously!? This is unacceptable!

At some point in this post I have to say things like CenturyStink and CenturySmell, and CenturyPoo, and really get those key words ingrained so that when they search for blogs about them, they’ll see that we’re not happy.

With that said, we will drop a link to the post that they made me oblige to write …which I updated with a comment detailing how they CenturyFailed. http://www.umpitygrumpity.com/centurytel-comes-through/comment-page-1/#comment-10358

We were not the only ones with a typical home network setup with CenturyLink who had daily disconnects almost hourly. Their service plain sucks and there is no getting around that. They can’t fix it either. They’ve tried. They had it “looked into” with several techs. Several higher-ups have looked into it and still blamed one dumb thing after another on us. Oh, the wiring in the house must be bad? OK – I replaced the entire wiring with brand new CAT5 straight from the demarc to the jack with the DSL modem and nothing else connected to the line whatsoever. So it’s still broken. What now? Oh, it’s because we have VOIP phones. Really? What kind of morons suggest that internet service gets dropped because of standard TCP/IP devices? Internet is what they run on!! Not break. Idiots.

Now come to find out CenturyWhore is buying up a semi-decent phone/internet company – Qwest. Why does this piss me off? Because I have Qwest internet and have been happy with it for months. Now it’s going to be subject to the same CenturyClank corner-cutting and terrible network management as the rest of the CenturyLink infrastructure. OH NO YOU DIDN’T.

CenturyLink, if you think for one second that I’m going to be licking your boots to stay a customer of QwuitLink FailNet, you’ve got another thing coming. Since I heard the news, I’ve already been looking elsewhere for internet. I’m leaning towards Verizon FIOS or maybe just the new AT&T 4G wireless data when it comes out.

Now that I’ve ripped these guys a new one, I’d like to know what they can come up with as far as web propaganda that makes it sound like they actually care.

Trust me, I wouldn’t have felt as compelled to write this, if they wouldn’t have made me feel obliged to write up a “they came through” post and then turn around and still fail in every way. What am I supposed to do? Write up an article redeeming them and leave it up even though technically they didn’t come through at all????? You can do the math as well as I can.

CenturyLink, you can leave and make your crappy internet monopoly go away with ya. I’m a savvy consumer, and I am not going to put up with your corporate bureaucratic BS. This is my CenturyLink rebuttal!

So Google, can you fix your browser? Don’t tell me it’s my fault… don’t tell me my comp has some kind of virus. That’s bull crap and we know it, because I keep my comp spotless from that junk and I know because everybody getting viruses has all sorts of antivirus apps and anti malware apps, and I don’t use but one, along with virustotal.com.

If it’s anything to do with my computer, then it’s got to be due to a flaw or something overlooked with standard compatibility within the browser related to the hardware I run on. I have a pretty typical setup, but you can’t blame it on software. It was doing this back when I was running a fresh install of XP, then the same thing on Vista…now a fresh install of Windows 7 and it is STILL wacko!

Get it friggin together Google!

I’m driving down the road eating a simple little Powerbar Protein Plus.  I look down and what do I see?  A flippin little piece of the candy bar on my pants.  Can I scrape it off before it melts itself permanently into my nice khakis?  Nope!  It’s already too late.  There goes another perfectly good pair of pants and it’s all because candy bars all fricken hate me.

I mean, I suppose I could try and be more careful.  Naw..I mean, shoot, I am pretty careful already.  I guess pants should just be more indestructible.  They can make pants wrinkle-free (which I want some by the way), but they can’t make them stain-proof?  Come on.  If there are good looking affordable pants that resist wrinkles and stains both, please let me know.  I just freakin hate stains.

Now let me begin on another gripe.  This involves internet that costs like $50 a month for residential service.  You would imagine, at that price a person would have pretty dang good internet service.  Wow, I mean, what a price to pay. We get 10 mbit/sec download speed and hmm maybe 3 1/4ths of an mbit/sec up speed.  Sure the down speed is nice.  The games don’t play so nice though.  The connection is just as crappy for me as for Shane’s 1.5 mbit/sec service from the same company.  It offers laggy multiplayer gaming, and what – …disconnects to boot!

I sit here using my web browser and email and what-not for a while, and I kid you not.  I’ve had to reset this dumb connection about 10 times tonight.  What on earth causes the stupid thing to go off that much in the first place?  It’s not wireless!  I just don’t understand.  CenturyTel’s networks really SUCK.  If they don’t do something to fix the internet around here so that uptime is more than 75%, …I’m gonna crack….CRACK!  I’ll go bonkers!

I wish internet could be something with more options to choose from around here.  CenturyTel is the best we’ve got.  Doesn’t that SUCK like…royally?  CenturyTel….you are one lousy service provider, and money grubbing greedy to boot.  TO BOOT!  I wish we could totally give you the BOOT!  SUCKY company.  YOU SUCK.